Brenda, a Vermonter in her mid-50’s, was secure and happy. She and her husband were healthy and had good jobs.
Ken paid all the bills, balanced the checkbook, and took care of the family finances. Last fall Ken was in a fatal accident. Unexpectedly, Brenda was a widow.
Although Brenda was grieving, the bills still arrived and had to be paid.
Like many couples, Brenda and Ken had not prepared for Brenda managing their daily monetary affairs. Often people do not want to think about their own or their spouse’s mortality, especially when they plan for many more years together. Sometimes it is simpler just to let one spouse manage all the money details. Other people, often women, fear math and numbers.
It may not be the death of a spouse that forces the other into this role. Unanticipated illnesses or disabilities are also possibilities.
Regardless of the situation, it is essential that couples prepare for the absence of the partner who handles the family’s money. While there are many qualified professionals who are available to help the surviving spouse, they need accurate information. Knowing in advance what bills are paid each month, how much money one has, and where documents are located will be one less burden at a time of extreme grief and stress.
How can you prepare?
Begin with your spouse. Let him or her know that you would like to understand your family’s finances should you ever need to take over this role.
Next, gather key information, including:
• Bank accounts and investments: For each account you need to know the type of account and ownership, bank name, account number, and location of statements.
• Income: For all income sources, record the amount and frequency of payment, whether it is by check or direct deposit, and into which account the money is deposited. Copies of paycheck stubs will give information on deductions and benefits.
• Bills: Make a list of the regular bills and how often they are paid. A perusal though last year’s checkbook register or bank statements will help recall bills that are paid infrequently. Are bills paid by check, on-line, or by automatic withdrawal from a bank account?
• Loans: List all loans, the name and contact information for the lenders and amount of the payments. Note how and when each loan is paid. Include all credit card accounts and lines of credit.
• Passwords: If your partner banks on-line, record the “User ID” and “Password” for each account. Many companies have security questions and randomly require correct answers in order to access your information.
• Tax information: Learn where documents are kept for the upcoming tax return, and the location of past returns. Last year’s tax return is a road map to income, investments, and other key financial information.
Brenda was lucky. Her husband kept organized records that she was able to find quickly. With the help of Ken’s files and good advisors, Brenda learned to manage her daily finances.
In today’s complex financial world, there are many details to know. Immediately following the death of a spouse is not the best time to search for information. By taking time now to record vital data, you will have a ready-made guide to assist you at a time when you need to focus on other things.
